The Church Hit My Head. Idol Worship, Elections, and Hurt

Sunday morning I prepared my head and my heart to preach.  It was the Sunday after the election, a time that confirmed everything that I feared and busted all that I had hoped.  I wanted to be God's instrument that day.  To speak the good news in the wilderness.  To share God's light for a people living in darkness hoping to see that sacred light.  I followed my normal routine, the running around with chaotic purpose, waiting for the clock to strike 9:45, and it happened.  The church hit my head.  Literally.  Out of instinct I tried to skip down some stairs that separate the pulpit for the adjacent hallway, and my head did not clear the wooden beam of the doorway.  POW.  I hit the ground, laughed at my stupidity, and tried to carry on like normal.  Except I wasn't normal.  My head hurt.  My stomach hurt.  I led worship, preached, limped along, and 24 hours later it's more of the same.  Nothing has changed.  My head still hurts.  It hurts for different reasons today; today I wonder, ponder, struggle with a deeper hurt that I've kept buried for a good week now.  There are hard truths that I need to accept, and I'm willing to do so now that I've been knocked off my perch and have been humbled, once again.  My head hurts.

The hard truth is that I feel like a stranger inside the church.  It's a place that once gave me hope, made me feel valued, wanted.  For a semi-depressed introverted teenager this was the embodiment of God's grace.  This experience has taught me how to be painfully empathetic toward those people whom Christ calls the "least of these."  I see them everyday.  The poor.  The homeless.  Lonely teens.  Vulnerable children.  White.  Black.  Hispanic.  Young.  Old.  Gay.  Straight.  And now as a father to an autistic boy I feel hurts to the point of making me nauseous when I see deep pains in peoples.  I mean, dear God, these are the people who need to SEE and HEAR and KNOW that the church has a home for them, that it's a place where they are welcome and loved.  And what have I seen?  A church who would shut the door in their faces.  It's a place that would build walls to keep them out, who would ignore their pain if only to selfishly focus on their own.  Instead of confronting the world and our broken nation, the church has mirrored it.  As I look at the church, I see a sea of hypocrites; people wearing smiling masks but hiding faces of anger and fear and mistrust.  And then I'm handed a mask too.  Best to put it on, or be an outcast.  Wearing one or not the result is the same; I'm a stranger in an land I thought I knew but truly never did.  My head hurts.

What happened?  How did it happen?  When did the church lose it's voice, it's hope, it's optimism, it's calling?  This happened because we have failed as a nation and in big ways as a church in regards to the 2nd commandment; you shall have no other gods before ME.  Idolatry is poisoning our hearts faster than we would admit.  We have a wretched collection of idols today.  Politics is an idol.  The "American Dream" is an idol.  Wealth is an idol.  Our culture is an idol.  Our weapons are an idol.  Our fear becomes an idol.  Our social media feeds is an idol.  Our fears and anxieties become an idol.  When we worship an idol, a false god, pay attention to the cost.  Idols require tribute, offerings of your time, your tithing, and your allegiance, at the expense of everything else.  We worship these idols expecting a return; usually in the form of security and acceptance.  The price we pay for empowering these idols has become abundantly clear.  As a society, as a country, as a community, and as families, we have broken.  Hard.  Us vs them.  We are broken, and breaking the pieces further, and we treat the brokenness as righteousness.  Now brokenness is evidence of how right I am and how stupid you are.  It's kind of like the chicken and the egg, which came first?  Did this pathetic election create the brokenness or simply expose it.  Yes.  And yes.  We were already drifting and were driven into our tribal/regional corners (urban vs rural).  Also this election counted on us to rely on these inner fears and anxiety to control our thinking, and it has worked (regardless of who would win).  Seriously, if I hear one more pathetic political ad or speech warn us about dangerous sex offenders I just might scream.  (This was a staple of NC TV ads.  Just note, negative political ads are produced only because they work.  Congratulations, here's your new idol to put up on the altar of your heart).  My head hurts.

This brokenness, this love of idols is only possible because of our lack of faith.  Jesus says "Feed my sheep."  Only after I feed myself or my family, then I'll look for leftovers in my pantry.  Jesus says "Love your enemies."  Only after we secure our borders and bomb the hell out of whoever is our enemy will I feel safe to love.  Jesus says "Love your neighbor as yourself."  Only after I craft my social media following to only include like-minded individuals whom I want to be my neighbors.  Jesus ate with sinners.  Only after we make sure these sinners won't steal our stuff will I feel comfortable in sitting down with them.  You think God would be proud of our choices?  People have become so freaked out I doubt they really care.  So long as we're nice, so long as following the shepherd is about being nice, we're good.  Because Jesus was nice.  My head hurts again.  These idols are hitting my head again.

Here's the thing; people whom I deeply love are beyond excited about this election's outcome and cannot hide their glee in reckless abandon.  I don't know how to talk to them, to love them or warn them, especially when I feel like a stranger in their midst.  People whom I deeply love are frightened, deeply and terribly frightened about this election's outcome.  I don't know how to talk to them either, to love them or warn them, especially when I feel like a stranger in their midst too.  The first group is told they're bigots and racists.  The second group is told they're lazy and spoiled.  Both sides are screaming at each other that all of this brokenness is the other's fault.  Implicitly I'm being told to chose who to love, and that's a terrible choice to make.  I'm a referee trying to keep two scrimmage teams from killing each other with only a whistle as my tool, begging, screaming at them to shut up.  They don't realize they're on the same freaking team!  My head hurts.

I guess I know what the third choice is, the right choice, and that's the church.  Back to where it all started.  It's the only place where sinners can sit at the Lord's table regardless of worth.  It's not an earned seat, it's been paid for by the blood of Christ.  You, me, we are ALL welcome.  It's the only place where the lame can walk and the blind can see.  Maybe that's where my despair comes from.  It's very place where I expect to find grace and instead I find the messed up world breaking in, tricking the church into embracing it's brokenness like its holiness.  It's the very place where the least among us is offered an open seat at the Lord's Table only to find a locked door, or a newly erected wall.  It's the very place where I seek to see God's face, a lowly person such as I, only to find it cozying itself up with the high and the powerful because it doesn't trust God.  I'm a stranger in the place I thought was home.  My head hurts.

Many colleagues in ministry are quoting Romans 12 nonstop, and it's very good and worth reading.  But it's not the scripture that keeps poking me in the head, hurting my head.  It's Matthew 12: 33-37.  Jesus loves everyone, right?  He loves the Pharisees, right?  With this in mind, here's what he said to them, "“Either make the tree good, and its fruit good; or make the tree bad, and its fruit bad; for the tree is known by its fruit. You brood of vipers! How can you speak good things, when you are evil? For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks. The good person brings good things out of a good treasure, and the evil person brings evil things out of an evil treasure. I tell you, on the day of judgment you will have to give an account for every careless word you utter; for by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.”

You brood of vipers.  I mean, wow.  Can I, a pastor, tell it's people you are a brood of vipers?  If I do, I'm obviously against "them" and for the "other side."  Already my message will be twisted before the words leave my lips.  So much for the nice Jesus.  That's where I am hung up.  Can I tell a broken and messed up church that its worshiping idols and not God?  Words are powerful, but I fear they've been neutered unless they prey on our inner demons, especially our idols of self love and vanity.  The prophetic words has lost its volume.  My head hurts.

So I look back at my younger self, the quiet scared teen who longed for friendship, to be valued, to be loved, and dang it I want to give him a hug.  Forget words, I'll stand with you.  I see those bullies and their raging toward you, but don't you worry.  I got your back.  They will have to get through me first.  I look the world now and see people who share the broken spirit of my younger self; the poor, the homeless, lonely teens, vulnerable children, young, old, white, black, Hispanic, gay, straight.  They're scared to death and fear the next day (read Matthew 6: 34 if that's you).  These people need me.  They need Jesus.  They need a church that's acting like the church!  I cannot and will not stand aside and let them get run over by the broken messed up world.  So hear me now; if you are vulnerable, or feel vulnerable, or scared, or lonely, I got your back.  Jesus had mine and still does, therefore I got you too.  If anyone is powering over you, please know you are not alone and their power is not eternal.  God is eternal.  He stands with you, so I stand with you too.  In the church. you are welcome.  Period.  Note, my head still hurts...

Also, and even more so, I'm going to keep loving, even though it hurts my head.  I'm going to love the church, love it so hard to make it better, with God's help.  Only with God's help.  I'm going to love the vulnerable, the helpless, the hurt, because I've been there and their journey should not and will not be walked alone.  And I'm going to love the idol worshipers, all of them.  I'm going to love them because Jesus does too.  And if that means I have to call them a brood of vipers, I will do so completely out of God's love and not in obedience to my own idol (because my idol says I should be silent, complicit, and avoid conflict).  And when you're weary, tired, beat down, I'll be beaten down with you.  Together we will find our way to the church.  There the doors are open.  There's a seat for us both.  Jesus is hosting the meal.  We will be welcome, all of us.  My head hurts, but now I can think more clearly.

I pray the passion in my heart burns strong when idolatry threatens to quench it, and that my head doesn't stop hurting until "justice rolls down like waters, and righteousness like an ever-flowing stream (Amos 5: 24)."

Cooking Cleric Recipe: Masterpiece Spicy Oven Fries

This took years to master, but I, the Cooking Cleric has the technique perfected and is now sharing with you for your enjoyment and pleasure: Spicy Oven Fries!  I'm going to take you step by step on how you can make these bad boys.  Remember, healthy tasting food is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy!  (PS, the burger is just as yummy but easy.  Grass-fed beef, open pasture, seasoned with a little seasoned salt, worcheshire sauce, and liquid smoke).  A regular recipe can be found at the bottom of this entry.

Here's what you need; two-three small-medium russet or baking potatoes, a nice large bowl with a lid, olive oil, cayenne pepper sauce, paprika, cumin, kosher salt, pepper, and a large baking sheet.

First thing's first; preheat your oven to 440 degrees.  Next, peel the potatoes.  Blah, I know.  .  Next, make your spicy oil mix in the large bowl with the lid.  Do this BEFORE chopping up the potatoes.  You'll need 2-3 tablespoons of olive oil, 2 tablespoons of the cayenne pepper sauce, and 1/2 a teaspoon of paprika and 1/2 a teaspoon of cumin.  Now if you're scared of the heat, that makes me sad, but just do the olive oil then, perhaps 1 tablespoon more if that's the case.  Then stir it up with a fork or something.

Now it is time to slice your potatoes.  Cut them into wedges or french fry shape, either is fine.  I have this picture here for scale; DO NOT CUT YOUR FRIES OR WEDGES LARGER THAN THIS.  I'm serious, smaller is better.  Larger wedges will under cook, and you'll chew a half-cooked potato and ruin your dinner.  This one is as thick as you want to get.  As you make your wedges drop them into the large bowl with your oil mix.

Once you're done making your wedges, put on the lid and shake it!  Shake it!  Shake it like a Polaroid picture!  It's the easiest way to evenly spread your oil among all sides of your fries, and it's also the most fun!

Now it is time to put your fries on the baking sheet.  Trust me, be OCD on this, don't just dump them.  Line them up nicely like this, it'll make the next step easier, plus it's the most crucial step.  Also lay the flattest side down on the pan.  In the oven the baking sheet will do most of the cooking, not from the top down.  Also, put your fatter fries on the right and left ends, not the center.  They cook a bit harder on the outside, so save that extra cooking power for the larger fries.  I learned this from experience.  Now finish seasoning the fries with kosher salt and pepper.  Don't hold back on the salt. The salt helps dehydrate the potatoes so they cook.

Put the pan in the oven in the middle section for 17-18 minutes.  You can watch the steam build up.  After the timer goes off, open the oven and avoid the cloud of steam that threatens to engulf your face.  It's not very comfortable.  Now take out the pan and set it out.  Let the fries rest for a minute or two.  Now it's time to get a spatula, the thinnest one you have.  Seriously, a thin one is what you're after.  Thicker spatulas will tear your fries up.  Now carefully start flipping the fries.  Most will be stuck to the pan, and that's okay.  That's the secret!  It'll leave a cooked, hard outside like a french fry which is out of this world!  I've found flipping my spatula over and then attacking the pan works well.  Get those fries unstuck, and flip them over to a lesser cooked side.  Put them back in the oven and cook them for 5-7 more minutes.  Note that tiny fries are probably already done and can be enjoyed now.  The normal and thicker ones will need this extra time.

Once the timer goes off, get them out and a couple may be stuck to the pan but most are not.  I made two patches tonight, we had an extra potato.  Eat them immediately!!!  Note that if you have leftovers, they are reheated best in a toaster oven or regular oven.  DO NOT MICROWAVE THEM!  They'll go soft and become nasty.  Just don't even bother.

These fries go great with a burger, hotdog, bratwurst, grilled veggies, grilled chicken, grilled fish, or heck, by themselves!!!

 

Mr. Lane Cunningham tried them tonight for the very first time.  And he gave his stamp of approval!  Yum yum!  So you will too!  Enjoy!  If you have questions, concerns, need advice, please ask!

It is a pleasure to serve.  God Bless.





Masterpiece Spicy Oven Fries

Prep time: 20 minutes.  Cooking Time: 25-27 minutes.

Ingredients and tools:

• 2-3 russet or baking potatoes
• olive oil
• cayenne pepper sauce
• paprika
• cumin
• kosher salt
• pepper
• large bowl with lid
• baking sheet

1. Preheat oven to 440 degrees.
2. Peel the potatoes.
3. Mix 2-3 tablespoons of olive oil, 2 tablespoons of cayenne pepper, 1/2 teaspoon of paprika, and 1/2 teaspoon of cumin in the large bowl.  
4. Slice the potatoes into wedges or french fry shapes.  Be sure to not slice the wedges too thick or they'll undercook.  Put the wedges in the bowl with the oil as you go.
5. Put the lid on the bowl when all the potatoes are cut and shake it well.
6. Place the wedges on the baking sheet.  Do so uniformly with the flattest side on the pan.  Larger wedges need to be placed toward the ends of the pan.
7. Season the fries with kosher salt and pepper
8. Put the pan in the preheated oven in the middle rack.  Cook for 17-18 minutes
9. Remove the pan and let it rest for 2-3 minutes.
10. Carefully flip the fries with a thin spatula.  Put the uncooked side down on the pan.
11. Put the fries back in the over for 5-7 minutes.
12. Remove from the pan and enjoy!

The Idolatry of Building Walls

My prayerful response to Donald Trump's wall building proposal, Pope Francis' response, and the kerfuffle hereafter.

We love walls.  Walls look cool.  China built a huge wall 2200 years ago to protect it from invaders, and now is a fun place to visit.  Pretty reasonable to build such a wall, don't you think?

Then a huge wall was built in Germany, right through Berlin in 1961.  Was this a good wall?  No, we say, because it divided families, made people feel sad, angry.  But if we talk to the Eastern side, it was great, keeping out an invading army of heretical Western values.  The Eastern powers thought it was a good wall.  No, says President Reagan.  He commands, "Mr Gorbachev, tear down this wall!"  And we cheered him on, because we hated this wall. 

Around Jerusalem today there is a wall.  Huge thing.  I've been to it myself.  For people inside Jerusalem they love it.  They think it's cool.  It keeps out all those awful Palestinian terrorists, Hamas and whatnot, and makes people living inside the city feel safe.  It's a nice clean concrete wall that resembles a prison or fortress, and it kind of is.  It keeps those invading forces out.  

But if you travel to the other side of the wall, it's covered in graffiti showing images of the wall crumbling down, or images of civilians killed in the struggle.  It has separated families (and it's a painful experience, see here), and if you have a job inside Jerusalem, good luck keeping it.  On this side the wall, it makes people feel sad, angry.  This wall is not cool.

Anyone feel like playing some Pink Floyd?

To be technical, we already have a lot of walls
built between Mexico and the States.  This one 
is in Tijuana

So Mr. Donald Trump wants to build a wall, a great big wall along the Mexico border.  Why?  Because America is being invaded, with all kinds of bad stuff.  Plus, with so many scared people here, a wall would provide a psychological boost.  Walls make us feel safe.  Walls look cool.  But, what if you live in Mexico and work in the States?  What if you have family that lives on both sides of the wall?  How would such a wall affect them?  Now I don't mean in a literal sense, how about in the heart?  And what of the women and children who are running away from gangs, drugs, sex slavery, hunger, murder, all that bad stuff we want to keep out ourselves?  

But NO you say.  It's only practical that we should beef up our border security.  It's sensible.  And what if bad people sneak in with the teens from Honduras, or bad people sneak in with families from Syria.  Nope, that's what the wall is for.  We feel kind of bad for you, but really, we have to look after our own first.  Sorry.

Jesus Driving Out the Money Changers by Scarsellino, 1585.
Jesus is tearing down the wall of greed inside his Father's house

If that's what you feel, if that's what sounds and feels sensible to you and that's how it's going to be, okay then.  Just know this, SECURITY IS NOT A CHRISTIAN VIRTUE.  Jesus didn't go about building walls, he tore them down.  Walls can create institutions, and institutions inherently tend to look inward.  That makes ripe soil to grow vanity, selfishness, and idolatry.  Those Pharisees that Jesus gave such a hard time; they're wall builders (Matthew 23: 29-36, Luke 11:39).  When Jesus' disciples started to think about wall building (Luke 9: 28-36), he shot them down.  He soon commanded his disciples go into the villages and town to heal the sick and proclaim the good news... without the safety of walls, roofs, and even without the large posse of the twelve (Mark 6: 6-13).  

You see, walls are not just security measures (whether they work or not, tunnels continue to be the ancient foil of walls).  Walls send a message to those on the other side; you are not welcome.  We're staying right here, and you can't come in!  They're great for building fortresses and prisons, but they're a lousy way to build the church, the Kingdom of God, if that's what you are interested in building.  

So here comes the retorts from many church going peoples; now now, we aren't keeping anyone out, we just want to be safe, be sensible, we feel bad, but you know...  You know what, I'm freaking tired of hearing the double talk, because that's what it is.  There is no interest in the concerns of others with this logic, except in forgettable platitudes.  Best to save your breath and not speak a lie.  Your need to feel safe comes first.  If that is what you put first, how can you claim that Jesus is first in your life?  Nope, he's second, and it shows in ugly, hateful, ignorant, and cheap rhetoric.  I often hear a followup of "we can't afford to," or "we don't have the space, money, etc."  My reply; "Where your treasure is, there your heart will be also (Matthew 6:21)."  Also where is your faith that God will provide?  There's that fear and insecurity again.  Safety is the god you worship, the god whom you pledge your allegiance, the god whom you give your sacrifices of time and income.  If you want to own this, by all means, do so.  But don't you dare pervert the Gospel by claiming to follow it while living in such hypocrisy.

  

Vatican City.  Boy it sure looks closed off (sarcastic tone).
Give me a break and stop reading Sean Hannity!

Pope Francis spoke correctly when he said, "A person who thinks only about building walls, wherever they may be, and not building bridges, is not Christian. This is not in the Gospel."  (FYI, he was asked specifically by a reporter quoting Mr. Trump's proposal.  Pope Francis said he would give Mr Trump the benefit of the doubt, "if he actually said these things."  Please note how the media works)  Of course social media has countered that Vatican City is surrounded by walls.  Technically true, but note it has a huge open entrance that I've walked through with no difficulty (much of the wall was built in the 9th century).  Also, if you've followed Pope Francis for more than 5 minutes, you can see he lives and ministers by his words, so the hypocrite line is worthless here (source).

The Good Samaritan by Rembrandt, 1630

Gospel living doesn't lead you to safety, it'll take it from you.  It's a call to be vulnerable, and to care for the vulnerable, and to be vulnerable with the vulnerable.  Security is power, and Gospel living has no place for such a false idol.  The priest and Levite played it safe, and we revile them.  The Samaritan became vulnerable to care for the vulnerable, and we applaud him (Luke 10: 25-37).  Say what?  There's bandits about, it's a dangerous road remember?  And those pesky purification laws still stand.  It didn't stop the Samaritan in this tale Jesus told, so why do we think of doing less?  The path to holiness, to be perfected in God's grace is found outside the walls.  Time to tear down the walls, including the ones we blatantly build around our own hearts.  

You Like It, I Don't; Most Modern Christian Music

Okay, as I pastor I feel that often I'm not allowed to dislike something, or critique it, unless it has that sin thing going on.  If it's sports, that considered neutral ground, sort of.  But for the rest of life, I have to grit my teeth, smile, nod, and pretend.  It is starting to get old.  Also I'm eager to write again and am fighting some nasty writers block, so I'm going to just stick my neck out and hope I don't get it lopped off.  ;)  Every week or so I'm to share something with you that you may really like that I don't.  It won't be politics, that's too easy.  The goal is to share, spark conversation, healthy debate, or mutual venting.  So let's begin;

Christian music.  I, can't, stand it.  I talking about the modern, Christian band that you find on many a radio station, KLOVE, online, etc.  Here we go..., "How could a pastor not like Christian music?!"  Allow me to clarify; in a worship setting it is...okay, perhaps...good.  Okay, in truth I mostly grit my teeth and tolerate it because I can see that for some people it's doing good for them (yes there are exceptions but they are just that, exceptions).  For me it's a painful experience.  I mean, I want to hide under the chair and weep until the storm of lameness passes.  Why?  This is why;

1. It all sounds the stinking same!  You hear people say that some music genres sound the same?  Same here, it all sounds the freaking same, like 2nd rate soft rock from the early 1990s.  You also play the same 3-4 chords like it's Sweet Home Alabama, and behold, it's "music!"  Praise God!  An exercise in monotony in the treble clef.  Gross!  I can't take it!
2. It all talks the same!  If there is anything about Christian music is that it's lyrics and message are utterly predictable.  It usually goes this way; God is so good, I am not worthy, you are worthy, all hail Jesus, he's my buddy and my friend and my Savior and my God and my Messiah and my pal, I am not worthy, God is so good.  There are slight variations; some that say how blessed we are, how blessed you are, oh we are so blessed, God blesses.  Or perhaps God is a genie in a bottle who grants the 3 wishes to the faithful prayers.  Yeah, that's how it works, NOT.  You hear one Christian song, you've probably heard 80% of the message that's been shared for the past 20 years.  Hear those thuds?  That's my head banging against the wall.
3. It feels like it's manipulating me.  Come on Brad, let the song tug that heartstring, come on, just give in, to the Dark Side (couldn't resist).  Lift your hands, close your eyes, sway with the crowd like we are about to do the "wave" but it's for God!  Try it on me, and I shut down harder than you'll ever see me do so.  I'm not rejecting God, I'm rejecting this, thing.  And let's be real, much of the Christian music is all about proselytizing as much as worship material.  If there is anything that makes me squirm, it's manipulation, even when it's subtle.  The American South is full of passive aggressive manipulation, I don't need it in my music!
4. It tries too hard.  So you don't like the pop soft rock sound Brad?  Try the heavy metal Christian music.  Or the blues.  Or the rap.  Or the folksy/acoustic.  Don't worry Brad, we will find the flavor of ice cream-I mean Christian music that you will like!  Well I tasted them all, and the word that mostly comes to my mind is...fake.  The Christian metal music annoys me the most.  See I'm a metal head.  I can't explain it, but when the music is pure and there it calls to me, rhythmically and tonally.  Banging my head with a crowd of fellow metalheads and raising my fist of horns, wow, it's primal, awesome, pure, and you can't force it.  It's there or it isn't.  So when I hear Christian metal, it sounds fake.  It's like watching a soccer team playing a baseball game for the first time.  Sure they're athletes, they sort of know the rules, they can run and hit and try to catch fly balls, but you can just tell, this is not their natural fit.  Are these Christian metal bands fake?  I wouldn't go there (not my call), but that's how I hear it, how I receive it.  It sounds like I'm listening to an imposter, and it makes me squirm.
5. I would rather jam to Five Finger Death Punch, Sevendust, Rob Zombie, Avatar, Lacuna Coil, Cilver (they're new and AMAZING), and a thousand other metal bands and my soul is just fine thank you!  I found my love of music in the grunge era, and this was the natural evolution.  When I tell people it leads to looks of amusement (which is great) or the raised eyebrow of skeptical criticism, which this leads into this darker place;
6. Listening to Christian music becomes the cheap calling card to proclaim you are a faithful Christian.  Don't get me started!!!!  Often it's true love, that the music does good for your soul.  Good for you, truly.  But for all my life I've also heard and received the message from many that, "It's all I listen to," which carries the not so subtle message "If you are a Christian you should too."  I doubt it's all you listen to, but I'll take your word for it.  Also, I might listen to it if it wasn't so repetitive, boring, predictable, manipulative, or pandering!  So no thank you.  I'm trying to channel my Simon Cowell tone and say that I'm trying to be kind.
7. So here come the comments; Oh Brad you haven't heard so and so or you may want to try listening to this and this.  Well here is some good news; I am not above trying new things.  I am not the picky eater who screams at the sight of new foods.  Everything gets a shot.  But it's best to keep your expectations low, because I've been waiting for a very long time for naught.

Now I'm not being a troll, this is all honest feedback.  This doesn't mean we can't do church together.  We should.  But this call to conformity, to blandness, to inauthenticity, I can't and won't go there.  

I'm also not sure if this is just a tip of an iceberg or a rant.  Maybe both.  But there you go.  Thoughts?